SHIT MEAT EATERS SAY - A Nice ”Collection” Of The Dumbest, Funniest & Most Illogical Things Meat Eaters Said!

(WARNING: This is so funny that you may end up rolling on the floor laughing (or crying), or even worse, you may end up pissing yourself…)

If you are a vegetarian or a vegan, you may have already heard many of these so-called ”arguments” that meat eaters often come up with, as an attempt to justify their meat eating habits… But, anyways, you should read this all, as you may be surprised to see some ”rare” ones, which are so pathetic that you won’t even believe that a human being could say such BS. So, please, read! And… ENJOY!!!!

”Whaaaat?!? No meat? What do you eat then?”

”Seriously? But what do you eat then?”

”I’m going to eat more meat from now on, just to piss you off!”

”You make me want to eat more animals.”

”You don’t eat meat? Fine. More meat for me!”

”Why do vegans feel the need to force veganism down our throats?”

”Everyone should have a choice…”

”Animals want us to eat them.”

”You’re going to get sick…”

”My doctor told me that I must eat meat.”

”But vegans eat shit too. You know, there’s lots of bacteria and microorganisms shitting on your lettuce right now.” (when told that most meat is infected with feces)

”But you don’t eat real food.”

”Vegans are pussies. Real men eat meat.”

”Meat is delicious.”

”Why do they make animals so tasty, then?”

”I really do love steaks that are still bleeding. Yum!”

”Me going vegan?! Are you fucking nuts?! I can’t eat only Tofu for the rest of my life.”

”When you cut grass, it bleeds sap.”

”Fuck salad.”

”I only eat animals that had a good life.”

”I want the animals to suffer before eating them, as it makes the meat taste better.”

”Who cares what they go through? They are delicious and you would have to be a dumb=ass not to know how meat and eggs are produced. It’s a fact of life and it’s food. I knew since I was a kid and it never bothered me.”

”But humans have canines…”

”Hey, dumb-ass, do you see these? They’re called K9s! They are designed to tear meat.”

”We’re omnivores. We are designed to eat meat.”

”I do crack bones with my teeth, and suck out the marrow.” (when told that true carnivores and omnivores have very strong teeth with which they can easily crack and crush bones)

”Brainwashed much? Vegans need to get off their conspiracy theory bandwagon and stop the paranoia they spread!”

”Veganism is vile propaganda.”

”If your lifestyle and diet were so healthy, then why is it not endorsed by one single world governing food body? For every sketchy bias little piece of research you produce, food authorities are backed by tenfold legitimate research. Pull your head out of the sand!”

”So you want to preach to the world about how unhealthy their diet is, yet you actively endorse drug use? Oh, and as for cruelty, you wear make up and leather, don’t you? Hmm, hypocrites much? Wake up!”

”I have spent 5 years at uni, looking this shit up. Unlike the lot of you, I actually have a formal education at the highest level in what I’m discussing, and, fact is, the overwhelming crushing weight of numbers in science does not support your vegan warped theories.”

”Grow up, mate! You are one sadly deluded paranoid individual. I will not continue to debate with someone so one eyed they are unable to critically analyze both sides of a subject. You are a joke! And what’s more, people like you are dangerous, spreading fear and lies around the world. You are every bit as bad as those corporate boogeyman you profess have it in for us.”

”Tell you what. You provide a study done by the Food and Drug Administration or the American Medical Association, and I might take your claims seriously.”

”Look, all you’re posting is hearsay and propaganda. Post a reputable source like the FDA or USDA. Heck, even Wikipedia would be an acceptable source. Just not conspiracy theories about the government agencies. New data, current studies - don’t keep repeating the same unfounded information when you are asked for proof.”

”You’re not really a vegan. Have you ever stepped on an ant? THEN SHUT UP!”

”Animal Rights? What’s next, Insect Rights?”

”Well, this is interesting… Every vegan I know is malnourished and looks like a walking zombie. I am currently enjoying a nice juicy piece of meat right now!”

”But god put animals on Earth for us to eat…”

”If god didn’t want us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have made them out of meat.”

”You’re vegetarian? So you only eat grass? WTF?!”

”You shouldn’t need links to prove something that your mother/school should have taught you. Meat has nutrients in abundance that you just can’t get from vegetables. Unless you can find me a nice protein tree, I’ll keep eating some cow.”

”Where do you get your protein?”

”Do you get enough protein?”

”Do you miss protein?”

”You eat rabbit food.”

”My food shits on your food!”

”I’m starting to believe you’re the first scientifically produced vegetable with a mind of its own.”

”OK, I know that you can technically get all you need from plants. The problem is that for most people, a small potion of meat is more efficient than running around and finding all the necessary plants.”

”If meat was so unhealthy, then why are life expectancies increasing?”

”What? No dairy? Be careful, you will lose all your teeth!”

”Take care of your teeth, because people who don’t eat meat get caries!”

”But you are killing plants. Why don’t you object to murdering plants?”

”Aren’t vegetables and plants a living thing? They are part of life, so why is it OK to eat vegetables, just because they don’t have a heartbeat? Poor Mr. Potato Head!”

”Carrots have feelings too!”

”It’s a well known fact that plants have feelings too.”

”I don’t get it… Isn’t life, life, regardless if it’s a plant or an animal? Research has shown that plants react to stimulus around them, and some say can even ”feel” pain. How is raising fruits and vegetables, just to harvest and eat them, any different than raising and slaughtering animals? Just because they don’t have cute faces doesn’t mean you’re not taking some sort of life to sustain yours.”

”Vegans are evil, because plants can’t run away.”

”You, vegans, murder billions of microorganisms when you drink water.”

”I’m allergic to garlic, so I have to eat meat.”

”Can vegans have sex?”

”Do you drive a car? Hypocrite!”

”You’re veg, but I bet you have a TV!”

”Vegans are all so fucking stupid, because they lack vitamin B12 in their diet.”

”I’m not attacking your way of life, why are you attacking mine? I don’t mind if you don’t eat meat, why do you mind if i do?”

”I won’t go vegan, because I just read on a site that vegans get sick and go back to meat eating.”

”I love animals and I feel sorry for them, but I can’t stop eating meat. I love meat.”

”I didn’t climb to the top of the food chain to eat plants.”

”It’s normal to eat meat, because our ancestors ate meat.”

”I wish I had your will power…”

”What do you eat, hay?”

”Can you eat tomatoes?”

”Have fun needing supplements for the rest of your life!”

”I’m OK with people being vegan, just don’t push your beliefs on me.”

”What’s wrong with you?”

”Keep calm and eat bacon!”

”Don’t you miss bacon?”

”This point is such a slippery slope. Maybe people don’t get much about biology, and want to just point at Nature and say ”Eww, why eat that?”. Eggs are something many organisms eat, and are an easy target to consume due to them being not even able to defend themselves. LOL! Yeash. Why do we eat them? Our ancestors did, case closed.”

”Are you stupid?! Eggs have the exact matching nutrients that are in the brain.”

”I only buy free range eggs.”

”We have to eat the cows, because they are the ones producing so much methane gas from farting. They’re killing the planet.”

”Cows have to be milked, or else they will explode.”

”Where do you get your calcium?”

”Most people’s reasoning for being a vegan is for the safety of animals. Considering the predicament of the chicken - it is a domesticated animal, it is flightless, and can hardly defend itself. Without the created need and want to for chickens, as a species they’d be very likely to die out. The demand for chickens has kept the species alive and well. To certain extent chickens have benefited from their high demand. Chickens these days are bred to be stronger, and with immunities to various diseases. You gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet. I would say veganism is more detrimental to the continuation of animal life than anything.”

”I don’t care if, by eating meat, I’m killing animals. I have things that bother me more. Like smoking… I hate it when people smoke!”

”If we don’t eat them, they will die out.”

”If we stop eating meat, what are we gonna do with all the cows?”

”But if we stop eating all the animals, they will be running about everywhere.”

”If we stop eating all the animals, they will become extinct.”

”The fields would be empty, and whole species of cows and sheep would not exist if we didn’t eat them.”

”They live much better in the farms than in the wild, eaten by wolves.”

”But they were raised for it.”

”They are bred for that purpose.”

”We give them life. Surely a short life is better than none.”

”Most slaughters are instant deaths and the animal feels no pain.”

”Why are you trying to make the lions eat vegetables?”

”So… Like, on your death bed will you really be pleased that you missed out on meeting steak and chicken and all that?”

”How can you let your child be vegan? How will he go to his friends’ houses? He won’t grow right!”

”Oh, by the way… Heart disease is largely genetic, diabetes genetic, most cancers genetic, osteoporosis genetic. You wouldn’t know what an actual piece of scientific literature looked like if it slapped you upside your ignorant head!”

”Go do some research, look at the facts. If you continue to be a vegan, have fun with cancer and osteoporosis.”

”I’d tell you high-five me, as a sort of congratulations for standing up for what you believe in, but you’re probably iron deficient, seeing as you’re vegan. Either that or you take substitutes. Humans can eat meat, cause we use the nutrients in meat. If you have to take subs to fill your diet, your diet is incomplete, and, in the end, wrong of a biological scale. You’re failing to feed your body properly. Source: I was a vegetarian till I discovered it was stupid.”

”If you’re vegan because of health concerns, it’s justified, but vegan in the name of ”morality” is ridiculous, or under the banner of ”It’s healthier!” - I’m not saying a meat centered diet, I’m saying that we can and should eat meat.”

”Vegans and sex is not proven longer life. It’s a variable, depends on your diet. And how does one measure quality of life? By the amount of years you got to crap your pants in an old folks’ home more than I did? Or the amount of times you got to do what you loved? Also, the term murder, the word’s definition doesn’t include animals. And shall I be a hypocrite? And to anyone who only loves cats and dogs - that is not hypocrisy, it’s favoritism.”

”Glad to see we both see the situation from the same angle, have fun with your delusion - your belief that humans, who have the ability to digest and consume meat, aren’t supposed to.”

”Why do vegans and gays go on about what goes in their mouths?”

”Meat isn’t decayed, nor rotted. That’s what freezing and refrigerating is for. There’s no pus, BTW - I have a few dairy farmers as friends. Yes, eggs are delicious. There’s no blood, BTW - so, no, they aren’t periods.” (when asked ”You think decaying flesh, cow’s breast milk (filled with pus, BTW), and chicken periods are delicious food? Wow, you’re really weird.”)

”Oh, well, I will still eat eggs. That’s why I freeze and refrigerate and the meat tastes delicious. They are friends, dumbass - I have known them since I was a kid. I have seen the farm in action. There is no pus in the milk. You watch too much propaganda. Does Campbell and McDougall lick your balls, as well? ROFL! They are a joke in the medical world with their bullshit biased studies.”

”You are female? ROFL! I am sorry - it was hard to tell judging from your picture. No, they get more then three hours of nutrition in college. I don’t need to go back to school. I have taken courses in nutrition myself. I see with my own eyes that meat is not unhealthy.”

”I don’t need to watch a bullshit video. I told you I don’t watch propaganda and bullshit. You are the blind one. Yes, I know I have more knowledge then him. Hell, most of my family has more knowledge then him. I won’t get neither. It doesn’t run in the family.” (about Dr. T. Collin Campbell)

”You people need to understand that humans need a lot of nutrients. You need meat, you need veggies - you need both. It does not mean you have to be cruel to animals. I love animals! But your body needs nutrients. Stop being such whine bags! There are people out there starving to death and if I had to choose between having to kill a deer to feed them and saving the deer and letting the human die, I would pick killing the deer to save the person, because they are human. A big difference! Get over yourselves! Dumb whine bag vegans! People are our future - we have souls!”

”Veganism is the end of life, not the future. Cruelty to animals is not nice, but you need nutrients from meaatttt! Stop being so one sided! You waste all your energy on this subject, when there are starving and dying innocent children all over the world that would kill for a piece of meat right now. If you can honestly tell me you would save a sheep before saving a person, you are truly sick in the head. Sorry, but you really are. Good luck living on grass all day long!”

”I could start posting photos about lots of reasons why you need to eat meat, but I don’t need that to prove a point. Good luck with the grass eating, buddy! I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

”No, I take creatine only, and, as for doctors, I go once a year for blood tests - haven’t seen one for a complaint in over a decade. And we don’t need doctors, ey? See you when you’re in your fifties and your body starts shitting itself and you’re begging a doctor to fix it!”

”Boy! If humans had so much love and compassion towards one another, as vegans do towards animals, wouldn’t this be a better world? So many starving people on this planet… They would kill any animal to survive. Would you criticize them?”

”Would you let your mother die to save a sheep?”

”Real hunters respect animals and train to kill quick with no pain to the animal, unlike a lion that will eat their pray alive screaming in pain.”

”I only eat chickens, because chickens’ heads look like they are too small to contain brains.”

”I am a vegetarian who eats white meat and fish. Red meat looks too like the real thing, so I can’t eat it.”

”We are vegetarians. But, of course, we can’t offend people by refusing their meat meals during visiting their places. And we feel so sick after, from the difficult digestion…”

”I’m a vegetarian, but I eat fish, because Jesus ate it too, so it’s OK.”

”It’s OK for me to eat fish and gelatine now, as I’ve done more than my share for the cause over the years.

”I used to be a vegetarian because of the karma principle, but now I don’t think I will suffer that much in the next lives for eating meat. Maybe I will get a cold, let’s say, but it’s not so bad.”

”I’m mostly vegetarian, anyway.”

”I will never be vegetarian, because it is so hard to be healthy and vegetarian.”

”Vegetarians have to take lots of different tablets and vitamins every day.”

”You, vegetarians, are prone to get ill very easy. I know it, because my vegetarian friend gets a cold all the time and she is very fragile. And also your body is so pure because of this diet, that it gets knocked out by any germ. Our bodies are used to filthy substances, so they have the routine of fighting a disease.”

”Studies show that vegetarians’ brains get literally shrunk in time. But luckily there are only 2% vegetarians in our country.” (on TV, some time ago)

”I used to be a vegan, but I had to go back to meat eating, because I got anemic and sick and hair started to grow on my face and in other weird places.”

”I get vegetarianism and I’ve tried it once (and failed miserably), but I really don’t get vegans. Why go vegan? Can somebody explain it to me?”

”Because they like not being healthy. Their diet needs supplements. The balanced diet is what is designed for us - meat and plants.”

”The studies are biased. I have energy all day long. I am not groggy, nor tired, ever. I eat meat daily. Yes, we are superior. Also we do not live shorter lives as you guys. Vegans don’t live longer. Neither diet shortens life spans. But omnivore diet is the healthier diet, whether you acknowledge it or not. Stay in your little dream world with your biased studies and propaganda. I know no vegans in real life and everyone I know is healthy and active.”

”What do you have for breakfast if you can’t have milk or bacon?”

”Animals know that they’re incarnating on Earth to be eaten, and they accept it.”

”Someone actually told me that’s what those animals are here for, isn’t it?”

”What’s happening to animals is bad, but not bad enough for me to go vegan.”

”So what if the pig screams in pain when slaughtered? It is an animal, so it doesn’t know what’s happening!”

”I am certain the animals don’t feel pain, since pain is only something humans imagined and started feeling.”

”Chickens don’t feel pain, neither do fish.”

”I have a problem with this type of videos - only the bad ones are shown and a lot of them are fakes.” (in response to someone who posted a graphic slaughter video showing extreme cruelty)

”You’re an extremist, because you don’t tolerate disrespectful jokes and insults. So what if the guy went too far? You have to be always calm and nice, since you’re vegans!”

”You are all hypocrites, as you kill millions of badgers, foxes, mice and voles, etc. when fields are cleared for growing your vegetables and when combine harvesters cut down the grains you eat - this is a far worse evil than the farming industry.”

”You’re weird!”

”Let’s eat vegetarians!”

”This is your truth. You are welcome to your beliefs and opinions, I have my own.”

”I do not believe in posting my beliefs constantly on here, or telling others to see things the way I do. Opinion becomes oppression when forced down others’ throats.”

”Do you eat fish?”

”Are you sure you don’t insert any flesh in your little sweet mouth?”

”I’m partly vegan.”

”And since I’m a vegan, I eat fish.”

"I am a vegetarian. I only eat chicken and fish.”

”Oh, that’s right - you don’t eat meat. Well, you can get a filet of fish and some fries.”

”I am a vegetarian indeed. I eat fish sometimes, because my nutritionist forces me.” (from a TV celebrity)

”I have been vegan for two days.” (while tucking into a bacon sandwich)

”Fish doesn’t count. They can’t feel anything.”

”If you love animals so much, then why do you eat their food?”

”You have no logical reason to care for other species than yours. You are an extremist!”

”If god didn’t want us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have put them here.”

”God gave us dominion over the animals, so that means we can do whatever we want with them.”

”The animals have to suffer, because we are very sinful and we angered god.”

”Look at this lovely juicy steak!”

”I’ll come back in the form of a lion and eat all of them up!”

”If your dog stops eating meat, it will grow rabbit teeth.”

”I’m totally with you, vegans! I have a dog!”

”That vegetarian is fat, certainly because he gave up meat.”

”If you were on a desert island and there was only you and a cow there, you can’t tell me that you wouldn’t eat the cow.”

”My local shops don’t sell vegetables.”

”It is OK if I thank the animal that sacrificed itself before eating the meal.”

”But do you believe in god?! Because god created the lion, for example, to hunt animals, and so he created us to eat animals.” *condescending look*

”This is BS! God put all these things on Earth for us to eat, or why did he help the fisherman and why did he feed 5000 with fish and bread? People are going too far. Denying what god has provided for us is a sin.”

”If you eat mocked meat, you’re not really vegan. Vegans are supposed to hate the taste of meat and they are hypocrites if they eat the mocked meat.”

”Oh, poor darling…” *pittyful look*

”Veganism is a mental illness.”

”Eating meat makes me feel good energetically.” (in the New Age meaning)

”Why are you trying to tell us what to do? Do you think you’re perfect?”

”Are you a member of some cult?”

”You’re cows. Moooo!”

”Oh, and I hunt. I love it! And then we gut the rabbits, and either give them to our ferrets, or cook them up and eat them ourselves. I love meat, I salivate at meat and I like to eat some of my steak raw before I fry it. I’m not the only one - most humans love meat. And what about fox hunting? We love the thrill of the chase! I shake with excitement just before I kill an animal and I salivate the whole time I’m cooking it.”

”HUNTERS = natural human instinct, you dumb ass fucks! Why are you all so thick? I can’t wait till we have another Ice Age and all you vegan brain washing freaks die, cause you can’t find any veg, while we survive the way we did back when we were evolving. We will have enough energy to find the veg we need after we have got our energy from animal meat.”

”I have a choice these days, as I have a gun and a dog and 10 ferrets, so all the meat I hunt is fresh. I’m not scavenging, because there are plenty of animals to eat that are alive and ruining our countryside, because they need controlling, so disease doesn’t kill them horribly, etc.”

”It’s your karma. Enjoy!”

”Eating meat is very primitive and will stop over many years from now. We keep evolving and everybody will, even if they like it or not. We are just one step ahead of the rest what makes us smarter, because we are emotionally more intelligent.”

”You look unhealthy. Maybe it’s worth a bite, man.”

”Vegetarian? But why?! Now I have nothing to make you a meals plan of!” (by meat eating nutritionist)

”I couldn’t survive in my city if I would be vegetarian, because there is nothing else in the menus.” (ignoring the bunch of vegetarians / vegans who thrive in the same city)

”Vegetarians pollute the planet mostly, because they use planes to transport from faraway all those silly shamanic herbs.”

”You’re a communist.” (even though meat was hard to find during the communist years)

”See, even when we fell out, I still didn’t have any meat.”

”Vegetarianism is a religion.”

”Veganism is a stupid religion.”

”I am an atheist and I eat meat. What’s wrong with me?”

”Being vegan is stupid.”

”There’s also overwhelming evidence that people believe the Earth is flat. That doesn’t make the belief any truer than your claims.”

”2 million native Americans couldn’t have been wrong.”

”Know what vegetarians say? Nothing! It’s just a gargling noise because of the dick in their mouth.”

”What? You’re vegan? No offense, I respect that you don’t eat meat and all, but vegans are fucking annoying!”

”Oh, right! Hardcore vegans are self righteous assholes who put themselves on a higher level then people who eat meat.”

”I don’t understand people who don’t eat meat. We need protein, and it’s in the Bible that we can eat meat.”

”I feel like crap if I don’t get enough protein.”

”I don’t want to know where it comes from. I like my ignorance.” (when asked to watch Earthlings)

”My body craves meat.”

”No one is looking, just try it!”

”Just eat it, I won’t tell!”

”You can tell he’s a bitter vegan.”

”I don’t respect any vegans or vegetarians. Period.”

”Us, meat eaters, also have every right to laugh at you and say fuck off and then eat a steak.”

”You guys are inferior to us. Meat eaters are superior.”

”Seriously, go get yourself a brain cell. Maybe all the meat you ate before you turned vegan rotted your brain, hahaha!”

”So what you are saying is, we should wipe out all the animals. You’re an idiot. Unless we do this, they will eat EVERYTHING, without us eating them. More animals on Earth, less plants for you, hippy fucks. Deal with it! YOU NEED MEAT EATERS! Vegans… Pffft. Go drink some chai, fuckwad!”


But here’s 2 more funny ”stories”!

One day, a vegan watched a slightly overweight meat lover doing physical labor, sweating and huffing, and said ”You should slow down, you’ll give yourself a heart attack.” - and he said ”You’ll expire of a heart attack faster than I will, because you eat so unhealthy.” — and then, when the vegan pressured him for an explanation, he said ”Because you put salt on your food.” - to which the vegan replies with ”Seriously? What about the artery clogging fat you eat?” (Plus, that vegan doesn’t use that much salt, actually.)

Meat eater: ”If we don’t kill them, the animals will take over the world.”
Vegan: ”But we aren’t superior to them. We can only kill them because we have guns. Try surviving in the woods without a weapon.”
Meat eaters: ”See? That proves it. They are trying to take over the world!”

So… Are meat eaters stupid? Maybe they’re not necessarily stupid!
But are they deluded? Yes!
Are they close minded? Most of them, yes!
Are they angry? Definitely!
So, maybe anger is the problem here… Maybe they say all those stupid things, because they are angry… Because they can’t deal with the fact that they are wrong, that there is NO excuse for what they do. And deep inside their heart they know it. And that makes them angry. So, they start acting like that! When they must face the truth - a truth that they obviously don’t like, because it’s not supporting their meat eating lifestyle (that they are used to and think is ”normal”), they either ignore it, or they just completely deny it.
But what if they actually act like that, because animal products ruined their brain, and they are indeed stupid and totally unable to think logically? I guess we can’t know for sure… Well, anyways, I prefer to believe that it’s because they get angry! It would be sad to know that there can be so much stupidity in this world…


(Note that most comments or quotes here have been corrected / edited, as most of the originals were full of typos, spelling mistakes, really bad grammar, etc. and many of them were not coherent at all. I tried my best to make them comprehensible.)

We need meat to live (eh? Try telling that to the vegetarian population of people in east India!!)

What do you eat then, nuts? (Me..well they do say you are what you eat!!)

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