Lorraine James

ethiopienne:

I go to school in NH. There is a VERY high rate of trans-racial adoption in the Upper Valley, and when I tell you those poor little black girls always have the most unfortunate heads of hair, I am not lying. We do hair days for them every once in a while, but I really wish more of their white adoptive parents would just LEARN how to do it. Yes, it takes patience. Yes, it is very different from dealing with white hair. No, it is not impossible.

I saw a little girl in the grocery store once and she pointed me out to her adoptive aunt and said “HER HAIR LOOKS LIKE MINE!!!” with the biggest smile on her face, and I swear to you my heart broke right then. And when I asked her aunt if she wanted a list of resources to learn how to care for her niece’s hair (and a list of inexpensive products I use on my own hair), she said yes and was amazed by how easy it could be.

Seriously, if you are going to adopt a black child, LEARN HOW TO DO YOUR CHILD’S HAIR. Learn how to give that child what they need as a BLACK child. I am not uniformly against trans-racial adoption, but people who adopt children of color for cool/cookie points or adopt children of color without bothering to understand what they are getting into and how to nurture that child in every way possible—INCLUDING racial sensitivity, understanding, etc.—will always get a side eye from me.

/endrant 

(Source: jcapislove, via racismschool)